Left back - a football blog

It was the annual Football League awards in the plush surroundings of London’s Hilton on Sunday as the cream of the Coca-Cola League descended on the capital. Kevin Phillips (Championship), Jermaine Beckford (League One) and Keith Andrews (League Two) were the big winners for their respective divisions but the biggest pat on the back must go to Four Four Two magazine for deciding the league needed this kind of ceremony in the first place.

Now in its third year, it is a chance for those down the divisions to let hair down, take in the free champagne and generally enjoy the fanfare of such an occasion. It is clichéd to say fans of league football and beyond have more of an affinity of what happens to their club, but this is glaringly true in most cases and a bash such as this is just the sort of reward to those who endure 46 game season slogs. With the full ceremony being broadcast on Sky Sports this Thursday, we also have the chance to enjoy some fantastically uncomfortable acceptance speeches/interviews as well.

Still, at least the Premier League never had an insufferable Coca-Cola ‘Real Fans’ advert patronising them.

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The Manager of the Month awards for February are in, so avoid backing the following teams as the dreaded curse descends on…

Stoke City! Tony Pulis was the victor in the Championship after guiding Stoke to five wins in six but, somewhat predictably, once the Potters reached the poisoned chalice of first place, they contrived to lose against Preston to give the sides directly beneath them a lifeline. Next up for City are the trio of QPR, Burnley and Norwich - all tricky, but all ultimately winnable. Expect to see them languishing in 4th by the beginning of April then.

Carlisle manager John Ward is the deserved winner in League One after wins over fellow promotion hopefuls Walsall, Doncaster and Huddersfield saw the Cumbrians end the month in 2nd, only the 12 points behind Swansea, while in League Two Peter Jackson gained the plaudits after Lincoln City won five of their six February games - all while battling cancer.

With the season beginning to hit its business end in terms of promotion and relegation, can the above continue their good form into the pivotal month of March?

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While Man Utd were dishing out the pain to Couldn’t be Arse-d-nal, Gary Lineker and Co. were dishing out their traditional Goal of the Month award to eternal flavour of the week, Cristiano Ronaldo.

It was a brilliant strike, one that many a journalist has waxed lyrical about of late, but spare a thought for poor Bolton captain Kevin Nolan. On the 13th of January against Blackburn, a high ball was launched to the midfielder who was standing 18 yards from goal in the far left side of the box. With his back to the goal, he swivelled on the spot to produce an outrageous volley that rocketed past Friedel with venom and into the net. You can watch it here.

As I’m sure you’ll agree, it was a strike worthy of goal of the season. It’s just a shame that reputation and recent media praise were somehow also brought into the equation for deciding BBC’s monthly award.

Do you agree and think that Nolan’s volley was better than Ronaldo’s free kick? Or was the Portuguese’s unique technique a deserving winner? I’d like to hear your comments.

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Further to KeepyUppy’s team of the season I thought I’d weigh in with mine. So here we go:

Keeper: Paddy Kenny - It was a close run thing with Paul Robinson’s fresh air kicks and general fatness but Kenny’s fatness, baldness and the fact that one of his friends bit his eyebrow off sealed the day for the portly Irish international.

Right back: John O’Shea - He gives hope to young, talentless footballers the world over. If John O’Shea can play for a team like Man United then so can you! He’s an inspiration.

Centre-half: Titus Bramble - Obviously inspired by John O’Shea poor old Titus is to defending what Princess Diana’s chauffer is to driving safely.

Centre-half: Matthew Upson - Hilariously West Ham paid something like £6m for the most injury prone player in football history. Upson, obviously brain of Britain, decided to leave soon to be promoted Birmingham for soon to be relegated West Ham in the transfer window. I’m sure his teammates will give him a nice wave as they pass each other.

Left back: Ashley Cole -  Even Chelsea fans hate him.

Right midfield: Darren Fletcher - He’s sort of like Ray Parlour but less ginger and rather too Scottish. Looks like an extra from Trainspotting, one of the passed out skagheads on a dirty mattress and funnily enough plays like one too.

Centre midfield: Didier Zokora - He claimed to have turned down a move to Arsenal and prefers life at Spurs. Best known for winning a penalty against Portsmouth with the kind of dive that Divey Dave, the divingest diver in all of diveland, would have been proud of. Runs around a lot. Does very little.

Centre midfield: David Dunn - Has the biggest head in world football and it has recently been discovered that the weight of his skull is responsible for all the injuries he’s suffered. Like Zokora runs around a lot and does very little although he is quite good at kicking people.

Left midfield: Stewart Downing - Huh? Gah? What? Why? Seems to only have a professional career because he’s left footed and possibly because he liked to touch Steve McLaren’s special area. Has scored two goals this season. Am assuming they were by accident.

Striker: Julio Baptista - He arrived as a good kind of ‘The Beast’ and will depart as the worst kind of ‘The Beast’. Imagine your mother in law with 35 inch neck playing football. Had a night of magic at Anfield when he scored 4 and then scored 2 against Spurs but that is the football equivalent of winning the lottery twice in one month. His season was summed up when he tried to bamboozle a defender with a stepover and as he was stepping over booted the ball out for a throw. Or something. Will go back to Spain and score 50 goals next season.

Striker: Bernado Corradi - Joined in the summer, has played 29 games and scored 3 goals. He’s battling hard with former Blackburn man Corrado Grabbi for the title of greatest Italian to ever play in the Premiership. Is so bad that Richard Dunne felt it was ok to criticise him for poor performances.

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When I was little, being voted into the PFA Team of the Year had a little more to do with “merit” and a little less to do with “playing for Man U”. Surely an oustanding performer keeping his team in the Premiership is to be praised as much as a player having an average season in a team storming to the title thanks to the brilliance of Ronaldo and Rooney? And surely anyone ought to be praised ahead of Gary Neville?

Here’s the PFA version, and here comes my revised version. If you don’t like it, post your own.

Goalkeeper: David James.
In an astonishing season for Portsmouth, James has arguably been their best player. He also just pips Abel Xavier to the Beard of the Year award.

Right-back: Steve Finnan
This is traditionally the hardest position to fill in the Team of the Year. This is for two reasons: a) there aren’t many high profile right-backs, and b) everyone hates Gary Neville. However, Steve Finnan has emerged from a few fairly average seasons to fend off the challenge of Arbeloa and shine.

Left-back: Nicky Shorey
Considering their achievements this year, it’d be madness not to pick a Reading player, and Shorey has arugably been their best. Some question why Gareth Barry hasn’t had more chances with England, but the only thing he seems to have over Shorey is a fine penalty-kick technique.

Centre-back: Nemanja Vidic
No complaints from me with the PFAs first choice here.

Centre-back: Ricardo Carvalho
Lord Percy is playing in the meanest defence in the league, and has had to manage without sidekick John Terry for considerable spells this season. As last night’s game against Liverpool showed, he’s not bad bringing the ball into midfield either.

Right-midfield: Cristiano Ronaldo
No qualms.

Left-midfield: Ryan Giggs
Again, deserving of his place. It’s not been a good year for wingers though. I blame Jose Mourinho for designing a formation narrower than Posh Spice’s waist.

Centre-midfield: Paul Scholes
Hm. Three in a row that are the straight out of the PFA team. Whatever happened to originality?

Centre-midfield: Michael Essien
Even this isn’t particularly original, as it strikes me as such a blindingly obvious choice. Essien has been unbelievable for Chelsea, and could probably have ousted Steve Finnan in the right-back slot, such has been his amazing versatility. Essien is much more than that though, and a key reason that Chelsea are still fighting on four fronts.

Striker: Didier Drogba
The PFA got it right to put him in the Team of the Year, but I might’ve gone a step further. For me, he’s the Player of the Year. Why? Because quite simply, he’s done it in the games that matters. How many outstanding performances has Ronaldo put in against the Chelseas, the Liverpools, and Arsenals?

Striker: Benni McCarthy
If it hadn’t been for an untimely injury, Robin van Persie would’ve had this in the bag. For me, he/Ronaldo/Drogba were easily the stars of the first-half of the season. As it is, I’ve gone for a player who already has 21 goals this season, 15 in the Premiership, and was signed for just £2.5m. The most impressive thing about McCarthy’s goals is that they’ve tended to come in ones - he hasn’t bagged hatricks against the lower teams, but has scored consistently against anyone and everyone, despite only playing in a mid-table side. A true bargain.

So what do you reckon?

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I wasn’t at all surprised to see Cristiano Ronaldo win the Young Player of the Year award but it was a bit of a shock to see him pick up the PFA Player of the Year award too. He becomes the first player to win both since Andy Gray in 1977.

I really thought Drogba would win the main award but perhaps the players prefer one kind of diving cheater to another. No question they’ve both, to a certain extent, cut out the theatrics from their game but Ronaldo is still capable of the kind of light-footedness that so irks fans up and down the country.

With the ommission of Lampard and Essien from the final panel you have to ask does that, coupled with Drogba’s failure to win the award, show how disliked Chelsea are?

PFA Premier League Team of the Year:
Edwin van der Sar, Gary Neville, Nemanja Vidic, Rio Ferdinand, Patrice Evra (all Man Utd); Ryan Giggs, Paul Scholes, Cristiano Ronaldo (all Man Utd) and Steven Gerrard (Liverpool); Didier Drogba (Chelsea) and Dimitar Berbatov (Tottenham)

When you look at the PFA team of the year it seems remarkble that there were 8 United players in it too. The entire back 5 is United even though Liverpool and Chelsea have better defensive records. And Berbatov has been impressive in parts but only has 7 Premiership goals.

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